If you’ve been following my blog for any time then you likely know I have a variety of medical diagnoses and disabling conditions. I have a number of diagnoses in the lumbar area of my back as well as depression, PTSD and an anxiety disorder. The last few years I’ve been struggling with pain in my shoulders, the swelling of my left arm and deteriorating range of motion in my left arm.
Two years ago, an Orthopedic doctor put injections in my right arm that eliminated the pain completely. I’d had a lot of pain in my collar bone. About a week after the injection the pain was gone. After favoring the right arm for so long, directed by my Personal Care Physician (PCP) to let it hang at my side and use it as little as possible, my left shoulder began to hurt. The pain ran down the outside of the back of my upper arm, spread over time to the front of my bicep, the shoulder itself and recently down into my arm pit and down my forearm. I talked to my PCP more than once about the noticeable swelling of my left arm, the discoloration of it, as well, that I couldn’t get it into the sleeve of my good winter coat. I was injected in my left shoulder more than once, without any relief.
Instead of referring me to an orthopedic doctor she sent me to a Physician’s Assistant in her office who studied orthopedics. He had a student inject me, with the same results as the other injections to my left shoulder.
I saw an Orthopedic doctor when I broke my foot and asked if he could see me for my shoulder. He x-rayed it and consulted that he thought I might have a partial tear of my bicep tendon. He injected it and instructed me if it didn’t feel better to let him know. The injection didn’t help any more than the other ones that had been administered to my left shoulder.
Honestly, I chalked it up to more pain I’d have to endure, as my pain medications did very little.
At my last six month visit I talked to my PCP again about my left arm. I told her I’d heard something snap when picking up my rollator and my range of motion was more and more limited. She ordered an MRI and referred me to the same orthopedic doctor that treated my broken foot. They scheduled my appointment with the orthopedic doctor first, then the MRI. He said he thought I had a partial tear of my rotator cuff or bicep tendon, he acknowledged the limited range of motion and the swelling, telling me if the MRI didn’t reveal a cause for the swelling, he’d order an ultrasound because after checking my pulse on both sides of my wrist he was concerned that there may be a blood vessel pinched or a clot restricting blood flow. He said if it was a partial tear I’d see him again, if it were a full tear he’d send me to an orthopedic surgeon.
After the MRI my PCP sent me a message telling me “the MRI doesn’t look too bad.” The ortho’s office called to say the doctor saw a more significant tear than the report indicated. He also saw bone spurs and arthritis, changes to my labrum and the humorous bone was riding above where it should be in the joint. He was referring me to a surgeon for opinion of best treatment.
My PCP did the same thing when I had an MRI on my back. She sent me a message saying the “MRI is unremarkable.” I asked what that meant, I was told there were no changes. When the orthopedic doctor looked at the MRI he said there were a number of serious changes, such as the vertebrae facets were ground off from all the walking I’d been doing and there were so many bone spurs, they had effectively self-fused three of my vertebrae. He’d recommended reducing the amount of walking I was doing.
I don’t understand her need to minimize, down play, what’s happening with my body. I can’t get adequate treatment or pain control if she doesn’t acknowledge the reality of my diagnoses. People tell me to change doctors, but it’s not that easy. Most of the doctors in the area aren’t taking new patients and it’s horrible starting over with someone different, as they often think one is just doctor shopping to get medications.
There have been two times in the recent past when she’s asked me when I last saw my cardiac doctor, and when I saw pain management. No one ever referred me to a cardiac doctor or even suggested seeing one, nor did she suggest pain management should be an ongoing thing, as she sent me there for my lumbar issues and when the insurance denied treatment they didn’t schedule me to see anyone again.
The last time I saw my PCP she was clearly stressed and distracted. She didn’t want to hear about my issues, I got “yeah, yeah, I can’t diagnose something like this in a 15 minute appointment.” She also chastised me that I shouldn’t have waited for my appointment to tell her about the pain in my left knee and left shoulder because the longer it goes untreated it can become permanent. I had told her for a couple years about both, (the knee diagnosed by her as arthritis, diagnosed by orthopedic doctor as sciatic related) that it had become more intense recently to my thinking was due to ignoring them for so long and treating them with the same ineffective pain medications for so long.
I know others with disabling conditions who struggle to get adequate care, have to fight for treatment, to be believed, as doctors dismiss a lot of serious complaints or act as if everyone suffers from these chronic conditions, chronic pain.
I can’t accept that this pain and these limitations are going to be part of the rest of my life. What kind of life will that be, suffering like this?